The famous Nigerian comedian Ali Baba has expressed his thoughts about the reasons why people stay in abusive relationships. Find out what he thinks!
Famous Nigerian comedian has stated his point of view about the reasons why people can’t get rid of abusive relationships. Ali Baba has compared people’s hopelessness to the wings that they don’t have.
“The reason some people can never be on their own is because they do not have wings. So you can not even be the winds beneath their wings”.
By these words he means that people who lack self-confidence feel like they have to depend on others. “They are flightless. You must tell them where to fly to and how to fly there, then give them wings too.
If that branch they perch on breaks… Kperen! They are going down”. Some people are just not sure about themselves, they can’t protect themselves. They feel like they only have to trust the opinion of others.
And that’s what gets in their way to become free. Moreover, the abusive partner keeps on offending them because they can’t resist it.
Ali Baba thinks that the victims of domestic violence have to learn how to protect themselves and how to gain self-confidence and self-respect.
“Some days ago, a young friend of mine quit her job to face her passion for serving sweets and deserts at events. Wings. The branch of the tree, doesn’t even need to break before you fly.
How many times have you been let go in an organization and you move on and your potentials make you a better talent, that you get head hunted again with higher pay and better package than those you left there.
Or a lady leaves you and you begin to drown in your self pity because, without her you are nothing. C’mon people take flight!”. The famous comedian wants people to fulfil their dreams.
Money isn’t the most important thing in life – we have to remember that without self- respect we can’t be happy.
The problem of abusive relationships
There are no risk factors – anyone in the world might become a victim of domestic violence. It’s very scary that the importance of this problem is usually underestimated.
A lot of people just don’t want to admit that they are abusive relationship victims. People tend to remain quiet especially if we’re talking about psychological abuse – they think that it will go away eventually.
However, the problems like this never disappear. You need to take the first step – admitting that you have this problem and that it needs to be solved.
The abusive relationship is definitely not normal so you need to end it. In case you think that you are a victim of domestic violence, you need to ask for help. There are telephone numbers that you can call.
Domestic abuse is the relationship between two people one of whom is trying to take control over another. The abuse can be psychological (insulting, etc.) or physical.
The person-abuser just wants to be the only important partner in the relationship – your part is just to obey.
There is no way that this person will be fair to you. They will do anything to make you feel like you are not important and they are with you only because of pity. The reasons can actually be different.
However, by insulting you and making you feel less important they are trying to show how better they are. They might also threaten you or some of your close people. Anyone can become a victim.
It doesn’t matter if you are in heterosexual or homosexual relationship. Moreover, the age and race are also not important for abuse.
It is believed that most of the time women are those who are abused more frequently and it’s true. However, there are also men who suffer from women’s domination.
Most of the time it’s obviously psychological abuse but its influence on a person is as bad as the physical violence. Whatever ethnic group or gender you belong to – it’s not okay.
No one has the right to hurt the person they love. That’s why you should never neglect it.
Is psychological abuse really a problem?!
Some people think that it’s only a big problem if their partner is actually physically hurting them. But is it really true? Being in abusive relationships doesn’t always mean that there is violence involved.
If your bones are not broken it doesn’t mean that everything is going great with your relationship. The number of people who suffer from this problem is extremely huge!
But unfortunately, people don’t realise how it affects their personalities and their actions in the everyday life.
More about psychological abuse
But why do people behave like that at the first place? What are their motives and their final goal? First of all, they want you to feel dependant on them.
By insulting you and pointing out your imperfections they want to let you know that you don’t mean anything and you can’t live without them.
They are usually very professional at convincing, that’s why you might feel like you have no choice other than stay with them.
Emotional abuse is anything that includes verbal insults – yelling or blaming for anything. Your partner wants to control your every move and they convince you that it’s what you want and what you need.
If you don’t agree with that they will become even more creative figuring out ways to persuade you that they are right and that you just have to obey.
Some people think that emotional abuse isn’t as serious as physical. They are right in some way. However, they don’t realize that psychological violence can also make you hurt yourself.
Therefore, be careful and don’t hesitate to talk to someone about your problem.
- READ ALSO: What is ladder theory of relationships?